He always impressed me

                           He always impressed me

Even though many people deny it, first love is the purest way to love, I really wanted to be able to love again in that way.

My first love was at 14, I was a girl literally and instead he was 18 years old, it never mattered how old we really were as if there were no numbers.

From him I learned what it is to love and hate. Every relationship starts well and it was no exception, I was that excited teenager why an older guy was interested in you, it was a dream, I could not believe he would take the time to love a girl, he was not my perfect man but it was my ideal at that time. With him I started to be a different person and I think he helped me to mature very quickly but I never stopped being a girl. I loved having him in my arms and his kisses. With him I broke the rules of the house, with him I enjoyed how little or much I had, with him I learned to read looks and with him I learned to love and love.

He always tried to impress me and he always succeeded. I discovered many things with him and sometimes he was too good to me. All the time we were together, he played the guitar and I lost the account of songs he sang to me every day and of how many times he tried to teach me to play it. I loved seeing it and hearing it, they were things I could be doing for hours. I always had a plan, whether it was going for a coffee, enjoying the air and so on, even wanting to take me to Berlin, which clearly was not possible.

He took me to concerts of my favorite bands and he took me to know everything he wanted and everything with him. It was very perfect to be so small. Of course with him I had my first time, it really was not the most romantic moment of my life but he always respect how far I wanted to go. And not only loved those days full of adventure and others I also liked those days where we decided not to do anything of life and I loved spending hours with him until his smell stayed on me, and so on.

Everything began to get worse when we went out with his friends. For them I was very small and stupid, he always defended me. He did not like to dance but at a party a friend invited me to dance. I accepted not to be rude and he told me that if I knew that all this was a bet. I laughed and did not say anything and he kept saying the prize is a simple demonstration that he could with the quinceañera. I went to claim him and he seemed worried and soon he stopped and asked me to leave.

From that moment on, everything started to go wrong, he took me to the car and told me not to believe anything about anyone, I was really scared and crying and got into a very upset situation. I got out of the car, ran and told him he was inconsiderate and so on.

I really felt bad that his game was so long. As expected, he looked for me until he managed to find me he asked me for forgiveness and he accepted that everything had been a bet, I cried so much and I did not want to return with him but something was asking me to shout that I needed it, the relationship continued but more damaged than never, after that, our relationship was merely a sexual issue, we only saw each other for that.

Once I told him that my period was not coming. He soon answered that he did not accept any of that. I got really bad because I was only 17 years old, how did you ask me for that? He was a wretch asked me to abort it so I could continue, I really did not even know if I was pregnant or not, on the part of other people they always asked me if I was sick or something really that stage of the relationship I fell a lot no longer was I It was his.

He picked me up at the exit and came with another guy, took me to a house very outside of the city and I was very confused. They started drinking and I did not want to be there, the other guy started like a drug and I looked very ugly. My ex was giving me a drink that made me more and more dizzy, and I only remember how I hugged him so as not to lose control, I stayed there and when I woke up alone I'm in a bed. There is nobody but suddenly I feel a very big pain in the belly and I see how I am bleeding, I scream as loud as I could, I was in a panic, it was too much blood. He took me to the emergency room and when they treated me he told me that I had a miscarriage, I could not believe what I was hearing, I had lost the baby that I was not sure if it existed, it hurt a lot and it still hurts why I'm sure he was the one who He made him lose it.

I could not tell any of that to my parents I had a lot of pain and so on. I did not want to see him, I took a taxi home and I was more devastated than ever, I lost my baby and I do not know what else they had done to me. He did not give up he looked for me and I dodged him until he once put me in the car, he seemed desperate he took me to a lake and we did not talk anything. It was a place that reminded me of the valuable moments at his side he began to swing and suddenly I had him kneeling with a ring asking me to marry him, of course I said no, but his face blue eyes and others filled me with nostalgia , if I wanted old Guti not the new one, I was barely and I was 17 and he could not hurt me so much by marrying him.

The third is the vanquished convinced me to return with him, he knew what to say and how to influence me, he moved out of town and I stayed there seemed like a good idea to keep the relationship quiet, he visited me every weekend, It worked a little but I started to be very jealous, and I implore me to go live in his city, I managed to convince my parents, of course I did not tell them the truth, I arrived and treated me like at the beginning of the relationship, then I did many parties in his dopa I was there, several times he left me alone and he left, he came back and I ran out of the room, he sent me and mistreated me as I wanted, one day I was tired of all that and I left, only without shouting or anything, he finally understood maybe all the damage he was doing to me or he had already got bored of it.

I return all my clothes and things I had with the broken and full of dust, said goodbye to me saying tenderly telling me I was a daughter of a bitch, I kissed on the forehead and started, I left there standing breathless, nothing . All that ended so quickly, I never thought I could have done it there were many nights without being able to sleep from so much crying for so many things that had happened and I did not realize, it was very bad days and full of sadness, anger and others, but he taught to face life and leave that comfort zone, the last time I found out something about him was that he is expecting a baby and that he is very tender with his partner, I am grateful that he found who took his good part at all times and with whom you can form a family.

I met him once in a square I saw him smiling, he ran to greet me and I came to the conclusion that it was the best we could do to separate ourselves, although again the destination did the right things with the right people. That time I could only think that I already felt nothing for him.